Surprising Reason Your Goals Haven’t Landed

How is today going for you?  Is it matching up with your hopes, expectations, and/or dreams?

We really want to know.

This question is important, because so many of us have a good sense of what we want.

• We even have Pinterest boards filled with particulars!

• We have exact numbers in mind for what we want to earn.

• We have movies we come back to again and again because the relationships portrayed are #relationshipgoals.

We work hard at these goals.
We keep a positive mind set – as best we can.
 

But for so many of us, getting to these goals just isn't happening fast enough.

[Cue the bugles or the superhero music...]

It's time for the big reveal as to why it can be so hard to get what we want, even when we try really hard.

Take a look at this image below. You're that little stick-figure climbing, falling, jumping, meditating, cursing, hoping – trying so hard to get to that beautiful thing you want way up there.

But the dream is still out of reach.

We've been working in this field – helping folks rewire their brains to be better at feelings so they can finally get what they want – for nearly twenty years.

And you know what's became painfully obvious during that time?

What you want isn't out of reach
- or weird
- or selfish
- or "too much"
– or unrealistic.

It's just currently beyond your nervous system capacity. On a sub-conscious level, what you want just simply reads as "out of the comfort zone".
 

Remember: your nervous system is not an idiot.

It's whole job is to protect you from anything that might be threatening.
(Even your own dreams.)

So what do we do?

Well, we get a ladder.

It's not made of wood or steel, or punishing work, or random luck.
 

It's made of neurochemicals.

Your brain utilizes many systems, but the Survival, Emotional, and Executive Systems are super key, and these are each run by certain sets of neurochemicals.

One of these systems (and it's neurochemicals) is reaally f-ing good at getting what you want.
 

Can you guess which one it is?

That's right, your Executive System!

Whatever it is that you want:

• connection

• money

• time 

• freedom

• creativity

• you name it

It's the Executive System that's going to get you there.

The best part is that you can build your own ladder.

We can give you the blueprint.

But every human has the innate ingredients to build their own neurochemical ladder to the land of plenty.

How?

Mixing metaphors here, it's a good idea to start thinking of your brain like parts on a car. Each part has particular needs if it's going to run well. When we service our brain regularly with the brain equivalent of oil, gas, and tire pressure, it can take us to magnificent places!

Each system in the brain needs daily servicing.

Survival System:

Keep it "oiled up" with physical safety, food, water, movement, etc.. 
When it overheats, cool it back down with body-based or orientation-based support tools like those we teach in our classes.
 

Emotional System:

Keep it "gassed up" with regular expressing, witnessing, and empathy around feelings.
When it overheats, bring in the tenderness, curiosity, and welcome touch. 
 

Executive System:

Get going!!
Dream up a destination and follow your map!

When we're diligent with our brain maintenance, we naturally climb the ladder to our Executive System – where not only can we imagine what we want, we are a neurochemical match for both creating it and receiving it.

Everything we do here at the Center is focused on helping folks build their ladder. 

You could pick anything from our menu and get started right away.

---

If you're looking for a particularly potent and exciting way to build your ladder – you might want to join us on this retreat.

April 19-25, 2026

Pura Vida Wellness Center
Yelapa, Mexico

(more details here!)

This retreat is for powerful duos who love doing cool, magical, science-leveraged personal growth stuff!

And remember!

You have a little more time to get in on the super sweet early bird 🐦‍⬛  special!

Interested?

(You can start with a deposit and figure the rest out later.)

Place your deposit on, or before November 4th and get a spa treatment of your choice – on us.

You can place your $500 deposit here to save your spot.

And as always, no matter how you choose to "build your ladder", we're cheering for you.

---

We can jump on the phone to talk about the retreat if you like!

What Money Messages Are Running Your life?

It's us again!

Your favorite scientific yet hippie, sovereign yet sensitive, witchy yet pragmatic, alternative yet down-to-earth, neuroemotional nerds!

To be totally transparent here, this is the third out of four blog posts we're sending you in which we geek-out about the neuroscience of manifestation  and invite you to our insanely divine retreat in April.

And...
 

In all honesty, each time we sit down to write one of these, we feel a little discomfort. 

It's like setting the most beautiful table, earnestly laboring over, preparing, and cooking up magnificent dishes we think everyone will adore, putting on our gold eye-shadow, and donning stellar outfits, and then having to sit in the vulnerability of waiting for our guests to arrive.

It's not easy!

Why?

Dude, programming is no joke!

We both got all sorts of messages that told us:

• To reveal our true selves is dangerous.

• To try hard is not cool.

• To do a really good job is actually risky because you open yourself up to criticism for being good at things.

• And on and on...

Early messaging is powerful.
It can detrimentally affect every aspect of our lives.

But even powerful messaging can be rewritten.

("re-wired" for you fellow neuro-nerds)

How do we know?

• We now send out gorgeous vulnerable letters to our community at least once a week.

• We put our actual faces on camera several times a week.

• We host international retreats and frolic in our bathing suits every year.

• We host people from all over the world in months-long certifications in which we cry, have imperfect deliveries, and drink our warm regulating beverages from cups that are as old as our relationship.

The proof is in the pudding, baby!

VULNERABILITY DOESN’T STOP US ANYMORE

Despite the early training we got to pay it safe, and blend in.

We'll be unlocking inhibitive messaging during our retreat, and implanting new wiring around getting to be and have all that we've ever wanted.
 

But what stops most people from signing up for an opportunity like this is...
 

the limiting patterns and beliefs around money they picked up from early messaging.
 

So, do you want to play a little game?

Want to find out what subconscious money-wiring has historically gotten in your way? (And may be getting in your way, right this second?)

Circle the number if it’s something you heard, were taught, or was modeled for you:

1. Money comes from working hard.

2. Having too much money makes you a bad person.

3. We have exactly what we need, no more, no less.

4. Don’t let anyone know how much we have.

5. There’s never enough.

6. You’re not good with money.

7. You spend it as fast as you make it.

8. Money is the root of all evil.

9. You need to marry rich.

10. Money doesn’t grow on trees (isn’t easy to get).

11. Money changes people.

12. It’s okay to spend money on [insert a family value here].

13. I’s not okay to spend money on [insert opposite of family value here].

14. If you scrimp and save you may be able to pull it off.

15. Money comes, money goes!

16. You only live once, enjoy yourself!

17. All you do is take, take, take.

18. Let someone else manage that for you.

19. Money is really complicated.

20. You’re greedy.

21. You’re stingy.

22. It is more blessed to give than to receive.

23. You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.

24. Wealth consists of not having great possessions, but in having few wants.

25. Poverty is a virtue.

26. The more you learn, the more you earn.

27. If you have time to rest, you have time to work.

28. Early bird gets the worm.

29. Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.

30. Nothing worthwhile comes easily.

31. A fool and his money are soon parted.

32. _____________________ [fill in what was modeled for you!]

(Click here to print this list out for yourself)

Are any of these messages embedded inside you?

• How has this messaging informed your money behavior?

• Does your net income (how much you have after subtracting the cost of working for it) line up with the messaging?

• Do you want this messaging to keep deciding how your money flow goes?

I (Natalie) recently realized my family taught me it was only ok to spend money on your house, or fruit. WOAH! This is important intel (says the woman who spent $100 on one big batch of blueberries last month) if I want to feel comfortable spending on other things – like travel, parties, self-care, clothes, or even a new car (gasp!).

In my extensive explorations, I (Nathan) clocked the fact that  between my early religious education and my own "survivors of the Great Depression" family mindset, I learned a) that money itself was the root of all evil, and b) living spartanly, and self-sufficiently, with a strong anti-waste lean was the only way to actually be a good person. This meant that for a good portion of my life I was blocking the flow of money coming to me, and I was stopping up the equally important flow of money coming through me. Both were vital shifts to make so I could allow abundance into my life, and to travel through me to others in my life.

Bottomline: We don't want to live according to our old messages.

We've been using our NeuroMagnetic Besties Retreat curriculum to help dismantle our old programming.

And wow...

It's rad..

Let's just say we're doing a lot less doing, and getting way better results –

• Surprise financial abundance – unrelated to working harder!

• Easier, more fulfilling connection with our most important people – without self-sacrifice!

• Big picture clarity, and precise effective action that is now saving us thousands per month!

We're all good at manifesting what our default programming has determined as "okay".

If our early messaging said it's only okay to work hard, and stay vigilant, we do  — earning just what we need to stay safe (not too rich! not too poor!) hustling on the work-hard-hamster wheel forever. Manifestation achieved!

If our early messaging said money is complicated and we should put someone else in charge, we do — we give over to someone "good with money", live on a vague "allowance", spend unconsciously, and try to remind ourselves to be grateful (despite the growing unease, or resentment). Manifestation achieved!

If we want to manifest something contrary to our early messaging…

We have to update our nervous system.

And really, what better way to do that than within a highly-curated container informed by leading-edge neuroscience, and 20 years of proven success?

And in one of the most protected, exquisite places on planet earth?

And with your best friend?

April 19-25, 2026

Pura Vida Wellness Center
Yelapa, Mexico

(more details here!)

We'll use our time together to dismantle the old messaging that's getting in the way, and recalibrate our entire system to be a match with what we actually want – no matter how far-fetched that "want" may feel from here.
 

It's a week-long retreat, but a months-long manifestational container. 

• In the weeks leading up, you'll get support through in-person sessions, foundational videos, as well as daily journaling practices that are customized specifically for you and what you're calling in.

• While in Mexico, you'll be in deep immersion, practicing how to receive care, abundance, and attention -  from juice delivered to your hands while you swish in the saltwater pool, to spa treatments, to gourmet meals.

• During afternoon workshops, we'll leverage our trademark Emotional Sovereignty tools to clear the NeuroMagnetic path to what you desire.

• After we return, we'll keep the magic alive with a community session as well as continuing journal practices that help to myelinate the changes to your nervous system.

You will not be the same after this.
 

Track your starting point because you can expect huge shifts!

(And they will likely start as soon as you place your deposit, so keep an eye out for winks from the universe that you're on the right track!)

This retreat is for powerful duos who love doing cool, magical, science-leveraged personal growth stuff!

Send this blog post to your bestie and play the checklist activity above.
IS THEIR HISTORICAL MESSAGING WORKING AGAINST THEM?

And remember!

There is one more week to get in on the super sweet early bird 🐦‍⬛  special!

Interested?

(You can start with a deposit and figure the rest out later.)

Place your deposit on, or before November 4th and get a spa treatment of your choice – on us.

• Fancy a massage?

• Or Watsu session? 

It's yours.
Complimentary!

(Did you get some messaging around not spending money on "frivolous" things like self-care? Maybe a *free* massage is a way to baby-step your nervous system into giving self-care the green light!)

You can place your $500 deposit here to save your spot.

A luxury retreat in Mexico with your bestie…

Where you get to fully relax and frolic…

While dissolving the nervous system barriers to your greatest desires?
LITERALLY, WHAT COULD BE BETTER?

Not to be too on the nose, but...

For fellow smart-witchy-snowflakes that are tired of the ol' hypervigilance dance, and ready to live into their birthright of divine calm, ease, and empowerment, it doesn't get any better than this.

---

Want to talk about how your early messaging is getting in your way?
Let's do it!

 We'd love to explore your particular nervous system and team up to see what's right for you.

Are You Good at Receiving?

As the outer world takes some twists and turns we do not like, we've been very seriously digging into our interior world.

Not as escapism.

But as creation.

We know – we can't manifest the dream vision we have for the world and for ourselves if our insides aren't a match.

The nervous system is predictive – it expects what's familiar.

Even and sometimes especially when our intention is the opposite.

Obviously we all want peace, connection, and abundance (among other things!), but sometimes our nervous system has an opposing "opinion" about getting them.

Want to play a cool game?
 

Find out how your nervous system really feels about getting what you want.

Things That Are Received/Asked For

• compliments

• birthday wishes

• gifts

• paychecks

• eye-contact

• event invites

• inheritance

• rent

• payments

• raises

• refunds

• help

• due payment

• attention

• favor

• feedback

• tips

• advice

• applause

• blessings

• special deal

• information

• seconds

• a raise

• intimacy

• more time

• cooperation

• advocacy

• company

• donation

• touch

• sales of your product

• booking of your services

• phone calls

• food

• to be paid your rate

• visits from friends or neighbors

• special accommodations

• to be prayed for

• to be listened to

• loan

How to play this diagnostic game:

1. Look at the list above.

2. Put each item into the category "Comfortable" or "Uncomfortable". If asking for the item is different for you than receiving it, you can split the two parts into different categories.

3. Do not overthink this.  If there is discomfort above, say, a level 3 (out of 10), put that item in the uncomfortable category for now because your nervous system signals a degree of stress or discomfort around that item.

4. Do not gauge "how far you've come". You've come far! You get major high-fives for that. Totally. But to get a clear sense of reactivity right now, we don't want a comparison, we want current data.
 

What did you find out?

• Are there any patterns you're noticing?

• Are some things easier to receive than to ask for?

• How do you feel about the length of each list you compiled?

Here's a little secret...

We've been using our NeuroMagnetic Besties Retreat curriculum with the data we got from playing this categorizing game.

And the results are...

Astounding.

In 30 days of working the curriculum in a concentrated way, sudden, surprising, unexpected results have come through in various, but very specific forms.
(Want details? Just reply to this email and ask!)

How we subconsciously feel about actually getting what we cognitively want is good information to know, because...

We can't manifest what our nervous system is protecting against!

April 19-25, 2026

Pura Vida Wellness Center
Yelapa, Mexico

We'll use our time together to get our internal landscape in precise alignment with what we most desire.
 

This manifestational container is exquisite, potent, and comprehensive.

• In the weeks leading up, you'll get support through in-person sessions, foundational videos, as well as daily journaling practices that are customized specifically for you and what you're calling in.

• While in Mexico, you'll be in deep immersion, practicing how to receive care, abundance, and attention -  from juice delivered to your hands while you swish in the oceanwater pool, to spa treatments, to gourmet meals.

• During afternoon workshops, we'll leverage our trademark Emotional Sovereignty tools to clear the NeuroMagnetic path to what you desire.

• After we return, we'll keep the magic alive with a community session as well as continuing journal practices that help to myelinate the changes to your nervous system.

You will not be the same after this.
 

Expect huge shifts in your ability to both expand and receive.

This retreat is for duos who are making the big shifts —

Working to manifest what has yet to materialize.

Whatever the two of you are calling in...

• More time

• More sensuality

• More passive income

• A new perfect-for-you relationship....

This retreat is your accelerator! 
 

Interested?

(You can start with a deposit and figure out the rest later.)

There are just two weeks left to get in on the early bird bonus 🐦‍⬛ and get a spa treatment of your choice – on us.

• Fancy a massage?

• Or Watsu session? 

It's yours.
ComplimentaryI

(What a great way to practice receiving!)

You can place your $500 deposit here to save your spot.

A luxury retreat in Mexico with your bestie…
Where you get to fully relax and frolic…
While dissolving the nervous system barriers to your greatest desires?
LITERALLY, WHAT COULD BE BETTER?

This is easily the most potent seven days of our calendar year, and we'd love to share it with you.

---

Want to check your NeuroMagnetic Alignment?
Let's do it!

We'd love to chat with you about your relationship to "getting what you want" and team up to see what's right for you.

✨ 2026 Retreat Reveal!

It's the big reveal.

We've dreamt up the most epic offering ever, and we want to invite you.

So, with no further ado...

Introducing the Center for Emotional Education's 2026 event of the year!

April 19-25, 2026
Yelapa, Mexico

This is an immersive and transformative manifestational experience for you and your favorite person.

• Best friends

• Partners

• Siblings

• Mothers and daughters

• Other one-of-a-kind relationships

We’re inviting dynamic duos
to step into a sacred adventure where
Emotional Sovereignty and 
Law of Attraction meet.

Here’s the heart of it:

“This retreat is not just about vision boards or positive thinking — it’s about rewiring your emotional brain to believe in what’s possible, with someone by your side who helps your system feel safe enough to believe it too.”

This is an invitation to step into a magical space where you can:

• Find the “missing piece” to the Law of Attraction.

• Get out of Survival Mode and into receptivity.

• Integrate the challenges and foibles of the past that are still holding you back. 

• Leverage Emotional Sovereignty to manifest what you really want.

• Carry the magic home with someone who speaks the same language and uses the same tools.

This retreat is for duos who are both at a yearning-edge —

working to manifest what has yet to materialize.

You're using your powers to call in:

• The ideal job

• Passive income

• The perfect-for-you relationship

• A new business, or new level in business

• Time-freedom

• An enticing challenge – sobriety, fitness, longevity

• More fun, ease, joy, you name it!

And you've been waiting for a key you didn't even know you needed. 

We're opening up registration to the wider public in just a few weeks. You have until then to claim the early-bird bonus! 🐦‍⬛

Those who grab a spot right away get a spa treatment of your choice – on us.

Fancy a massage or Watsu session while we're on retreat? 
It's yours.

Complimentary.

Just for jumping in before we open it up to our broader community and beyond...

Once we share it outside our mailing list, this offer will be gone.

This magnificent adventure has been years in the making.

We can't wait to share it with you.

You can follow this link to read more about:

• The relationship between manifestation and Emotional Sovereignty (it's the key!)

• The support (before, during, and after retreat)

• The location (a precious, unique, unparalleled place, owned by indigenous families)

• The venue (right on the shore, oceanwater pool, jacuzzi, yoga deck – with a light footprint)

• The accommodations (the rooms are works of art)

• The food (fresh, local, organic, yummy, and digestion-friendly)

• and more.

---

Want to know more?
Book a complimentary NeuroMagnetic Alignment Call to discuss!

We can’t wait to co-create this adventure with you! We're going to redefine epic.

Already know you're in alignment?

October's Emotional Forecast May Surprise You....

The other night we were telling our daughter about something our dear friend and colleague had shared with us about the concept of a "progressed moon" in astrology — and then our daughter said, admiringly, "Gosh, there are always new ways to be a hippie, aren't there?".
 

We looked at each other, took a sip of our respective kombucha or cacao cocktail, and grinned.

Call it hippie or call it Earth-wise.
Call it woo-woo, call it aware, or call it just plain weird.

We don't ____ing care.

We love the crossroads between the invisible realms and science.

So here's a dose of both 😉:

• How the stars might affect your emotions this month

• What you can do about it
   

🌦️ Emotional Weather Forecast
October

Theme of the Month: Communication & Emotion

October’s skies stir up our inner tides. This month asks us to find the balance between what we say and what we feel. Sensitivity and patience will be key to navigating this time period well.

At the Aries Full Moon (Oct 6–7), conversations may seem more charged, words sharper than intended. Messages fly fast, and misunderstandings are likely.

NeuroEmotional Strategies for Success:

• Take a few regulating breaths before speaking, especially your truth. (Hint: this means an exhale that is twice as long as your inhale.)

• Wiggle your toes and get some body awareness before responding, particularly to words that rubbed you the wrong way.

• Nod or make an understanding sound effect until/unless you have another reply that feels aligned.

Mid-Month: Longing & Relationship Currents

By the second week, relationship matters rise in importance. Venus reminds us of our longing – not just for connection, but for self-realization. This is fertile ground for honest conversations in partnership. Approach with sincerity, and what you plant now can bear abundant fruit.

The Libra New Moon (Oct 21) is your invitation to beauty, harmony, and grace. 

NeuroEmotional Strategies for Success:

• Be mindful of brain states. The Survival System is wired for protection, not connection.

  • If your partner is:

    • moving fast

    • not making eye contact

    • or, answering in monosyllables...

  • Wait to discuss your relationship!

• Purposely meet your need for beauty, even if it's on a very small scale (such as the arrangement of your food on your plate).

Late October: The Floodgates Open

As the Sun enters Scorpio and a grand water trine (Oct 24–28) forms, emotions may flow with extraordinary force. Suppressed feelings may surge to the surface. If you find yourself swept up, don’t fight the current.

Jupiter’s influence suggests eventual positive developments, but first comes chaos, surrender, and the reminder that boundaries can be porous when Neptune is involved.

NeuroEmotional Strategies for Success:

• Notice your feelings (feel free to complain, vent, and describe where and how they're coming up).

• Name the feelings out loud to yourself — is it "tenderness" or "anxiety" or "secret resentment", etc., and then specifically, is it "worry", "concern", or "panic", etc. — find the right words for the emotions and repeat them.

• Say loving and empathetic things to yourself that validate and show understanding for these feelings.

• Once you sense you are free of the messy-entanglement of the stories surrounding the feelings (you may notice your breath has calmed and deepened, or your perspective has become more optimistic), clarify your decisions and take action.

The Emotional Month-at-a-Glance

• Early October → Practice regulated speech. Dig deep and/or wait for patience before speaking or acting.

• Mid-Month → Explore your longings. Share them with those that are in the brain state (Executive, if you please) to connect with you.

• New Moon (Oct 21) → Invite beauty in, and feel the enjoyment.

• Late October → Explore your emotions instead of suppressing them, listen to what they say and respond with empathy.

💡 Forecast in a sentence: October is an emotionally charged month where communication and relationships are tested. But with patience, connection, beauty and empathy, the storms will irrigate the soil for even deeper growth.

Want support for October?

Here are some great options from the Center for Emotional Education:

Ride the waves with a professional

Humans aren't meant to navigate emotion alone. You deserve your own NeuroEmotional Coach who will support you with tools to use in session and outside session.

Use the button below to schedule a powerful conversation with one of our coaches about where you are now and where you really want to be – this month and beyond. And if it's right for you, find out more about 1:1 support. On us!

–> Join "Dear EQ, What Do I Do?"

Dear EQ, What Do I Do? is a monthly group coaching opportunity where we explore the most emotionally intelligent ways to navigate life's challenges.

This month's session is October 22nd, 11am Pacific

(You'll also receive our entire catalog of previous sessions when you join! Talk about "inviting beauty in"...)

Emotional Intelligence (EQ): The way forward in hard times

So now we have to ask you – are you emotionally intelligent enough to survive the apocalypse?

Juuuuust kidding!
(but only kinda-sorta!)

The ability to read, feel, and integrate emotion is in.
(And needed now more than ever!)

Mis-reading, stuffing, and reacting to emotion is out.
(Any examples of this come to mind lately?)

So, the real bajillion dollar question that just might save our species, is....
 

How do we teach emotional intelligence?

1. Model, Model, Model

Emotional intelligence is not learned via pen and paper, or by lengthy lectures from Mom and Dad. Thanks to mirror neurons, if we model healthy emotional expression, our children pick it up – just like walking and talking.

We can:

• Identify frustration when the garbage cans block the driveway.

• Express our nervousness and insecurity when it bubbles up before a holiday party.

• Stop saying “I’m fine,” when we’re actually feeling worry or irritation.

• Stop waiting to be alone before we shed tears.

Tax bills, divorce, wars, and scary politics do not belong in the realm of the innocent, it’s true. And, living our emotional life out loud doesn't mean always revealing the adult material behind our woes. We can express sadness, anxiety, anger, disappointment, or fear without sharing age-inappropriate details.

Here's a sample exchange that emotes and protects:

“What’s wrong, Mama?”

“I’m feeling some anxiety right now.”

“Oh. You’re crying?”

“Yep. I feel some sadness, too.”

“Are you okay?”

“I am okay. I’m taking good care of myself and good care of you, and I’m feeling feelings at the same time.”

A parent that cries when they feel sadness, names their emotion, and continues to care for themselves and others is an emotional leader. This kind of modeling teaches children to effectively use their Emotional System, the most efficient and powerful way to manage the ups and downs of life.

2. Don’t Fix

When our children are upset, we often find ourselves willing to do almost anything to make the crying or screaming stop.

“MOM! I dropped my cookie and the dog ate it! Dumb dog! Waaaaaah!”

“Oh, honey! It’s okay! Honey, stop crying! We have more cookies. Look! Here’s a new cookie! Really, it’s okay. It’s not a big deal.”

When the upset doesn’t stop, even though we’ve come up with a perfectly logical solution to the problem, it’s can be so confusing – until you understand how emotions work.

Feelings don’t get fixed.

When emotion shows up, the logical, trouble-shooting Executive System takes a coffee break (it doesn't do emotion!) and the Emotional System takes the lead. If there is a trusted person willing to hold space for the emotion, the emotion surfaces, is processed, and then lightens and lifts.

The Emotional System hates it when we approach emotional situations with logical solutions.

It’s like being shouted at in a foreign tongue. It’s simply not the right language for emotional processing. And it often comes across as antagonistic, not soothing and safe.

When the Emotional System is asked to do logic, instead of emotion, it joins the Executive System on that coffee break, and cues the Survival System to jump in and do what it does best: Fight, go into Flight, Freeze and shut down, or lie, cheat, and steal (Appease) in order to get back to safety.

For all our sakes, we need to get comfortable with our discomfort when our kids are upset. Emotion is a friend, not a foe, and we can prove that to our kids by not pushing them to avoid emotion with logical fixes.

3. Connect, Connect, Connect

If we're not hiding our own emotion, and we're not fixing theirs, what are we doing?

We’re providing connection around emotion.

All we have to do is notice an emotion, help name that emotion, and express understanding for that emotion.

In practical terms it looks like this:

Notice: “The dog ate your cookie?”

Name: “Shoot! How do you feel about that?”

Connect: “Darn it! That’s not what you wanted!”

Notice: “You're saying you don’t have anyone to hang out with at school?”

Name: “How is that for you? Do you feel some loneliness, sadness, anger...?”

Connect: “Sounds like you really don't like that. It feels good to be with people you enjoy, huh?”

Notice: “Your sister has the water bottle you want to use?”

Name: “I see. Feeling some frustration, huh? You both want the same one.”

Connect: “Shucks. You really wanted to use that.”

We can leave space around the emotion instead of trying to tidy it up too quickly. And ask open-ended curiosity questions like:

• How long have you felt this way?

• Have you ever felt this way before?

• Where do you notice it in your body?

• What's the ________ (feeling they named) like?

Let them describe the emotion to you and then empathize some more. If it's welcome, you can augment the sense of connection with eye contact, proximity, and static touch.

What about adults?

Right?! It's not just children that need or want to develop more emotional intelligence!

The same steps apply whether we're working with our own emotion, or the emotions another human being is experiencing!

• Model

• Don't Fix

• Connect

At first, it can be kinda effortful to identify what feelings we're feeling. Initially we may only be able to name a few basics, like “frustration” or “worry.” But the more we look, the more varied shades of emotion will emerge. The process of getting to know oneself and love oneself at this level is new and unfamiliar, but with practice we’ll definitely get better at it.

We can do this.

We can raise our children and ourselves to use emotions to all of our advantage.

We can nurture robust Emotional Systems that not only help us through even the darkest hours, but also build meaningful relationships based on true connection.

Emotional smarts help us stay steady, together.

Empathy Schmimpathy… Why Bother?! The Value of Teaching Children Empathy

To be frank, we’re reeling from the latest developments in our country. Violence has no place in our politics, and yet it keeps striving for one... We keep soothing, and processing, and strategizing ways to meet the needs of this moment. And we keep coming back to this:

Empathy is the antidote to the wrongs of the world. Its absence lies at the root of most challenges.

(To be clear, we're talking mostly about Cognitive Empathy, here. Not just the Affective kind that happens to us automatically, when we wince at someone else's pain... But the perspective-taking, understanding one another's intentions and motives, "walk a mile in each other's shoes" kind of empathy.)

So as a tribute to courageous empathy...

Here are seven reasons empathy is the most important thing we can teach our children:
 

1. Empathy is the root of social guidelines.

The vast majority of laws, moral codes, and family rules are ultimately about considering others. Teaching empathy bridges the gap between instinctive, self-focused infants and compassionate, “more civilized” adults. When we know how to understand another's experience, we need far less guidance about not mistreating each other.
 

2. Our brains are wired for empathy.

We are born with mirror neurons  that automatically simulate the movements, expressions, and emotions of those around us. When a child sees a smile, their brain briefly rehearses making one, giving them a felt sense of the other person’s experience (that's Affective Empathy). This natural mechanism underlies our ability to interpret emotions, but it needs to be reinforced by receiving empathetic support in childhood in order to build it into an ability to better understand others (through Cognitive Empathy).
 

3. Empathy entrains the brain.

When a baby cries, the parent’s Emotional System lights up in sync with their baby, preparing them to respond. The parent’s calm, empathetic response not only helps soothe the baby in the moment, it also teaches the infant's brain how to genuinely self-soothe and, over time, how to respond to others with empathy, too.

This part happens wordlessly — without a single lesson on why it’s important or on how to act with empathy. The same way one learns their native language.
 

4. Empathy supports full-brain development.

The brain has three key systems we talk about a lot:

• The Survival System, which keeps us alive.

• The Emotional System, which governs feelings and social behavior.

• The Executive System, which enables problem-solving, creativity, compassion, and more.

When kids are upset, the Survival and Emotional Systems take over, and they lose access to higher reasoning and functioning. Empathy helps them move through the storm of feelings and return to an Executive state — and repeated experiences of empathy grow their capacity to spend more time there.
 

5. Empathy creates safety.

When children feel our empathy, they know they're safe – both in the world and inside themselves – even when emotions feel overwhelming. That sense of safety is foundational for emotional regulation, resilience, and secure bonds.
 

6. Empathy gives parents superpowers.

Empathy can diffuse conflicts, dissolve resistance, and heal hurts. It recharges our own nervous systems, helping us find patience and compassion we didn’t know we had. And neuroscience shows that offering empathy not only helps our children — it rewires our brains toward more compassionate, balanced responses at the same time.
 

7. Empathy turns struggle into opportunity.

Every meltdown or conflict becomes a chance for connection, healing, and trust-building. Empathy tells our children’s brains: you are safe, you are loved, and your full humanity is welcome here. That bond lays the groundwork for cooperation, connection, and deeper relationship for years to come.


We focused this one mostly on parents, but you don't have to save up your empathy for just your (or others') kids! Sprinkle it around like faery dust! Because, even though they're all grown up, empathy works on the brains of adults just as well.

Go gently, natural born empathizers.

What to Eat When Your Nervous System is Fried

Guess what kind of food is best?

FOOD IN GENERAL!

Sorry to "yell", but many of us get thrown into Survival Mode just because it's been hours since our last meal and the nutrient tank is running dry!

When the body doesn't have enough resources, it decides for us that higher levels of functioning should be put on pause, and it's time to just get by until things get better.
 

Does this ever happen to you? 

It happens to us, too.

In these instances, we recommend eating anything that's available until you can get to food you really want. 

But when planning that grocery list or getting started on dinner — we can set ourselves up for less Survival Mode, and less intense emotion as well, when we give our body foods that support the nervous system. 

So here's a good list to inspire meal planning for the nervous system!

Magnesium-rich foods:

• Leafy greens (spinach, kale)

• Nuts (almonds, cashews, pecans)

• Seeds (pumpkin seeds, flaxseeds)

• Whole grains (brown rice, quinoa)

These are good sources of magnesium, which plays a role in nervous system regulation and reducing stress. 

Our Magnesium Strategy:
We buy big bags of mixed nuts at Costco and stash small ziploc bags of nuts in our backpack, fanny pack, etc.. (I, Nathan, am snacking on pistachios while we write this...)

Omega-3 fatty acids:

• Fatty fish like salmon

• Mackerel

• Sardines

• Avocado

These are excellent sources of omega-3s, which have been linked to reduced anxiety and improved mood. 

Our Omega-3 Strategy:
We don't love working with raw fish too much. So we buy salmon patties, pop them in the oven, and pair them with a big basic salad for quick meals.  We also love putting half an avocado on our bowl of grains and veggies. (We also take a mixed omegas supplement, to get an array of fatty acids.)

Foods containing L-tryptophan:

• Turkey

• Eggs

• Some dairy products (yogurt)

• Tofu

• Lentils

These are rich in L-tryptophan, an amino acid that the body uses to produce serotonin, a neurotransmitter associated with mood stabilization. 

Our L-tryptophan Strategy:
Almost every day we fry up some eggs for lunch because they're fast and simple. If we have some leftover veggies from the night before, we'll throw these in. We also make a regular batch of dahl and throw in chunks of tofu.

Dark chocolate:

• Dark chocolate (70% cocoa or higher) contains flavonoids that research suggests improve brain function and help with stress management. 

Our Chocolate Strategy:
We eat chocolate, of course!
But we also drink cacao sweetened with honey and/or xylitol. We buy it in bulk because we like to drink it almost every day. Our favorite brand is Navitas (we're not an affiliate, but we should be...).

Fermented foods:

• Yogurt

• Kefir

• Sauerkraut

• Kimchi

These contain probiotics that support a healthy gut microbiome, which can impact serotonin, mood, and anxiety levels. 

Our Fermented Food Strategy:
Some of us like sauerkraut and some of us don't, but we all love kombucha! We've been brewing our own for over ten years, which makes it very inexpensive, and once you're in the groove it's easy-peasy to do.

Complex carbohydrates:

• Quinoa

• Brown rice

• Oats

• Sourdough

• Sweet potatoes

These provide a steady release of energy, helping to stabilize blood sugar levels and prevent mood swings. 

Our Carb Strategy:
We like to put one cup of basmati, one cup quinoa, a can of garbanzos, a splash of oil, and some spices and/or herbs in a pot with 4 cups of broth or water, and cook like you normally would rice.

This makes a more exciting grain-pilaf sort of thing that can be topped with whatever you like. We often top with salad, steamed veggies and tofu, and a wedge of avocado. Sauce of your choice can be drizzled on top.

Here's to full bellies, and agile and well-resourced nervous systems!

From our table to yours...

Elsa's Real Secret (and Yours Too)

We recently go into a discussion about what Disney character best symbolized our own journey. 
And after talking about it and musing on it for a bit – we still hate to admit it (just so cliche!) but...

It's Elsa from Frozen.

Yes, the snow queen who belts out “Let It Go.”)

Maybe everyone can secretly relate to Elsa...?

Because here’s the lowdown: Elsa isn’t just a Disney character.

She’s an archetype of what so many of us go through when our natural power and sensitivity feel like "too much".

Here's Elsa's timeline – absolutely rife with Survival Mode!

• She's born with incredible powers, powers she doesn’t understand or know how to wield.

• As a child, she accidentally hurts her sister (Survival Fight).

• Her family hides her away so she won’t hurt anyone. (Their Survival reaction to her Survival reactions...)

• Later, overwhelmed by fear and shame, she lashes out when her sister announces her engagement (Survival Fight), and then flees into isolation (Survival Flight/Freeze).

• Even in her self-created ice palace, she accidentally wounds her sister again (a tangled mix of Survival Fight and Freeze).

Oof, sounds too familiar.

Survival Mode isn't composed or conscientious. It shows up in ways we don’t want, in patterns we don’t choose, and it often hurts the people we love most.

But in the movie... Elsa discovers her truth. She simplifies it down to:  Love is the key.

When she can get back to a place of love, she can use her gifts with clarity, freedom, and joy. 

This is the same arc we guide people through with Emotional Sovereignty work.

Because we're all at least a little bit like Elsa.

We have incredible power, sensitivity, and capacity within us. But until we learn how to work with our nervous system and brain states, those gifts can feel overwhelming and even dangerous, or conversely, muted and out of reach.

As we see it, Emotional Sovereignty is the map for moving from Survival Mode to absolute empowerment.
 

It’s a gorgeous hero’s journey:

✨ From being run by our nervous system, to learning how to work with it.
✨ From reacting in Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Appease, to responding with clarity and agency.
✨ From fearing our emotions, to using them as a source of strength and enrichment.

Just ask our students (and coaches!)...

No one wants to be stuck in an ice castle...

Or in any form of Survival Mode!

Students in Emotional Sovereignty School report an average decrease of 50% in time spent in this debilitating state.

Imagine what becomes possible when you get half your time back!

What about you?

Is your inner-hero spending too much time in Survival Mode?

We'd love to hear from you!
 

What movie archetype are you living out right now?

And...
If you’re ready to write the next chapter of your story...
Emotional Sovereignty School is calling your name!
There's still time for you to enroll in this term, which starts August 28th.

So if you know you're ready (to not just spend a whole lot less time Frozen, or in Fight or Flight, or Appeasing others), here's a wink from your fairy godmother. ✨ Go here ✨ to find out more, check out payment options, and sign yourself up! 

Or

If you're thinking about this, and you're not sure yet, and/or you just want to talk it through with someone, we'd love to offer you a "Testing the Waters" Strategy Session. This is not a sales call. It's just a chance for you find your own alignment and where you can:
– Share your journey thus far.
– Get help identifying where Survival Mode has sabotaged your best intentions.
– Find out how Emotional Sovereignty work might support you and your becoming.


And in any case (whether you ever come to Sovereignty School or not) no matter what, you're definitely our hero!

Your Brain On Transition (and What To Do About It)

What's changing in your world?

Over here in Missoula, Montana, our neighbor Carol's elm is starting to change color. And we hate it!
We love Carol, and her tree, but danggggg, we do not want to shift gears out of Summer-mode.

Is Fall awesome? Yes.
Are there delights in every season? Of course.
Can we get hygge like the best of them? You know it.

But who cares?

Transition still sucks eggs.
It happens a lot.

• Summer to Fall

• High school to college

• Daytime to nighttime

• Awake to asleep 

• Asleep to awake

• Single to married

• Married to single

• Fertile to menopausal

• Working to retired

• Weekend to workday

• Workday to weekend

But no matter how many times it happens...
 

Humans struggle with transition.

Go ahead and test this theory by asking any 6-year old if they want to transition from playing with their Labubu to going to a pool party. 

Transitioning from one thing to anything else, (even something awesome) can invite all sorts of discomfort.
 

Why is transition a challenge?

Dude, it's primal.

We're wired to prefer more predictability than novelty. Change is akin to uncertainty, which to our Survival System, is akin to threat.

Picture the Cro-Magnon version of yourself chilling on a grassy plain, enjoying the breeze. Now picture a shift in the wind, a gamey scent in the air, a rustling in the bushes.... Uh oh! Could be a lion and you might be lunch!

It may not happen every time, but that transition from known (Labubu play) to even slightly unknown (pool party) can be enough to awaken the Survival System. This is when that 6-year old says...

• I HATE pool parties!" - Survival Fight

• [Runs from the room] - Survival Flight

• [Acts like they didn't hear you] - Survival Freeze

• "I'll get ready in five minutes, I promise." (then doesn't) - Survival Appease

But who are we kidding. If we're pointing fingers at 6-year olds, let's be fair and swing that finger around...
 

Think of the times of your life where you struggled.

Was transition involved?

Heck, think of the times you struggled yesterday. Was transition involved?

– Our clients and students often identify the "Witching Hour" between work and dinner, as the moment they tend to "lose their shit".

– Daylight savings?
– Or returning home from somewhere? Anywhere?
 

There's emotional fallout around transition.

We're likely to feel uncomfortable, and that can show up as:

• Overwhelm

• Anxiety

• Dread

• Grief

• Worry

• Frustration

• (You name it)

This is normal.

Standing on the threshold, between what was, and what isn't-quite-yet, is a tough place to be (no matter how long it lasts), and it makes sense to have feelings about it!
 

So what do you do?

Well, if we leave it up to the Survival System...
It will either entrench us in non-change (safe and certain!) or plunge us blindly and hurriedly into the new realm – maybe through force, or whim, or impetuosity. This is the ol' "out of the frying pan into the fire" method. The instinct is super strong to just hurry up and arrive in the next place, instead of suffering at the unknown threshold.

If we leave it up to the Emotional System...
It will inflate and exaggerate what we're leaving behind and what we're heading into. The past chapter will become a rose-colored utopia to cling to, while the next chapter is full of dismaying terrors. Or, conversely, because the Emotional System is fickle like that, this system will decide that the last chapter was "the worst ever", and "good riddance", while the next chapter is going to be heavenly, perfect, and free of all problems. Depending on what feeling we happen to be holding during our time on the threshold, we can swing from dark pessimism to naive optimism – sometimes within moments of each other.

Neither are good options!

Instead, it's time for some Emotional Sovereignty.

We can retrain our brains to have an easier time with transition. Here's how:

1. Notice moments that count as transition.
   Recognize them when they show up, and highlight them ahead of time if possible.

2. Drop into the body.
   What brings awareness or ease back to your physical vessel? Do that. (The Survival System chills out when you do.)

3. Name 2 - 3 feelings.
   Name, out loud, whatever is true for you. (The Emotional System loves when you do this.)

4. Say something kind to yourself.
   Normalize these feelings, show understanding for yourself in them. (The Executive System flicks on when you empathize with your feelings.)

5. Make one small choice that supports this transitional moment.
   Do you need to get your hair off your neck? Take a long gulp of water? Bring something with you?

"Rinse and repeat" as needed.

For bigger transitions*, the threshold is wide, so it may be a good time to call in external help – like a NeuroEmotional Coach – who can support you to increase your Emotional Sovereignty and decrease the Survival and Emotional fallout of your transition.
 

It's wonderful and woeful to be a human.

The human condition is no joke!

Let's all give ourselves a big, enthusiastic, "high five" for doing the best we can – every time we can. 

Here's to you and yours, during your micro and macro transitions. We're in this together for sure.

*If you let us know what big transition you find yourself in:

• New partnership

• New baby

• Launching business

• Empty-nesting

• Divorce

• Mid-life rethink

• Retirement

• Perimenopause

• Career change

• Identity shift

• Loss

• You name it

We'll let you know which coach we think would be the best match for you.

Just email love@centerforemotionaleducation.com and we'll get you sorted. 💛

No wins. No treats. Still better.

I recently had a terrible day... I was very unhappy.

Took a walk. Noticed my mind scanning for something – anything – that would make me feel happier. 

I checked all the externals:

- Was I particularly thin, beautiful, or stylish today? NO
- Did I make some good money today? NO
- Impressive bank account? NO
- Yummy dinner planned? NO
- At least some cheese or sugar waiting? NO

Nothing on the outside was going to do it.

Alas.

I begrudgingly resigned myself to shifting from the inside.

1. Get out of Survival Mode

For 15 minutes I worked tools from Unit 3 of Emotional Sovereignty School:
– 54321 (elaborate version)
– Light Touch
– Regulating Breath
– “Do I have a body?”

2. Work the emotions

By the time I reached the riverbank, I was body-calm enough to use Notice, Name, Touch (Unit 6):
– I named every feeling and let it headline:
WORRY: “I’ll never figure this out.”
FRUSTRATION: “If you have good ideas and work hard, you should win.”
– Etc., etc.
– I followed with empathy, used my name, touched my chest lovingly
– Added breath and anchoring

Then I dove deeper:
– Found the biggest emotions
– Named their catch phrases
– Touched where they lived in my body
– Let them say wild things
– Followed their lead

By the time I reached the roses in the waterwise garden, I felt better, but not buoyant.
I checked for optimism or ideas.

Still nope.

So I doubled down on empathy for 5 more minutes.

3. Offer gentle support

Out of the depths, and having the sense of being seen, I used Unit 11 tools to list easy next steps:
– A couple handfuls of blueberries
– Hair brushing
– Shower + favorite soft PJ set

I knew I was back to my real self when I could tell, even from afar, what my body wanted to eat and what I could make from the pantry.

Still wary I might “fall back in,” I chose a color anchor (Unit 3) and kept breathing all the way to the doorstep.

4. I returned.

Same porch as an hour ago. But now the world – and I – felt different.
– I ate the blueberries.
– Kissed my partner.
– Slowly brushed my hair.
– Negotiated for the good bathroom.
– Made the most delicious dinner.

I changed *nothing* on the outside.
And everything on the inside.

I heart Emotional Sovereignty.
 

And you can have it too!

Feel free to use this recipe I used the other day. 

And if you want more, more, more... Emotional Sovereignty School might be a great fit for you.

In any case, we're sending love!

---

Curious?

Here are the 4 Phases inside Emotional Sovereignty School

August wants your courage 💪

In solidarity as emotional beings, we wanted shared with you this month's emotional weather forecast!

We've blended Astrodienst's brilliance with our own Emotional Sovereignty framework, and the combination is magical.

Enjoy!
 

🌞 August Emotional Forecast

August opens with a lively, sometimes jittery hum in the air... Mercury and the Sun meet in Leo on the 1st, inviting everyone to be a little more talkative, opinionated, and a bit self-focused.

Expect conversations to be plentiful, passionate, and occasionally one-sided.

This is a month for courageous dialogue, even when the questions on the table feel tender or overdue... Venus in Cancer is stirring deep emotional waters, and Saturn is asking for structure and honesty in our relationships. 

Keep in mind:

• Romantic ideals may need a reality check.
• Unspoken expectations will want daylight.

Emotional Sovereignty means remembering that state-specific thinking is real. 

Don't be tricked into believing that things your person says while in Survival Mode, or Emotional Mode, are their deep truth.

      • Stay regulated, soothe your own Survival System.

      • Help shift the collective nervous system.

      • Only determine what's true or make decisions when everyone is back in Executive Mode.

🌕 August Full Moon in Aquarius

The energy peaks with a potent Full Moon on the 9th.

This is the tension between old neural wiring (“stay safe, don’t risk it”) and your nervous system’s craving for new possibilities.

• There is hardly a better time to start manifesting new visions and ideas. 

• Doubt and fear will likely surge, and left unsupported, could put out new sparks.

• It's time to lean into courage, assume your responsibility, and take steps (even small ones). 

Emotional Sovereignty means remembering there is tension between old wiring and new neural habits

Feelings are normal. It's important to listen to them, be with them, but they don't get to design your next chapter.

To gently shift feelings out of the driver's seat, use Notice, Name, Touch™ to:

      • Recognize when emotions are in the mix.

      • Identify them by name.

      • Give them (and you) empathy, understanding, and connection.

💕 Venus meets Jupiter in Cancer

After the intensity, tenderness floods in on August 12th.

Connection feels richer, gratitude deeper, and the bonds we’ve been tending (or mending) have room to bloom.

• Look for ebullience and other deep and intensely delightful emotions.

• New relations and projects started at this time will carry the signature of these emotions.

Emotional Sovereignty means not only staying in connection with our self at all times, but also being available for connection with others.

Connection doesn't happen by accident. Doubling-down on our regulation and staying in-tune while around those we care about, gives them the emotional safety required for them to be vulnerable and open with us – the trademarks of true intimacy.

To connect with others:

      • Go where they are, whether it's the kitchen, or the dance hall, and use regulating techniques.

      • Be available for eye contact.

      • Open your body posture, lower your shoulders.

      • If they say something, empathize and then ask an open-ended question about what they said.

🌑 August New Moon in Virgo

The tone sobers, asking us to integrate what’s been stirred up, with the new moon on the 23rd.

Nervous systems may feel thin-skinned here. Clarity comes only after slowing down enough to really sense what’s shifted.

• Be available to support yourself through nervousness or restlessness.

• You may easily take offense, or cry.

• This is a good time to invest in resilience practices and allow your thoughts to quiet.

Emotional Sovereignty means knowing when it's time to rest and restore.

It's common for emotions to peak and ebb for any number of reasons. Just because we feel a feeling, doesn't mean something's wrong or needs to be addressed. This could be the right moment to jot down the feelings and complaints, and then set that piece of paper aside, and return to it when personal resources are higher.

Resilience practices for restoration:

     • Rest more than usual – naps, quiet time, or more sleeping hours.

      • Eat more complex carbohydrates and foods rich in omega fatty acids.

      • Drink more water than usual.

      • Move more slowly in your daily movements.

🦁 Venus in Leo

Starting the 25th, creative fire, passionate love, and bold female voices color the last days of August.

This is a ripe time to express yourself, let art move through you, or say the thing that’s been burning a hole in your chest. Some connections may get spicier, and go deeper than expected.

• Look for ways to chime in on discussions of social development – your voice is needed.

• Lean into that creative impulse wherever it pops up.

• A sudden love affair may show up! Whatever that may look like for you – don't hesitate.

Emotional Sovereignty means staying with our self, even during busy or invigorating times.

Emotion is stimulating and activating, even (and sometimes especially) those many consider "positive" – like inspiration, motivation, enthusiasm, infatuation. It's easy to sabotage ourselves when things are going well because without some processing, these more sought-after emotions can fill our capacity, and then we overflow and shut down. 

Wire to "withstand " the good stuff:

      • Set a timer on your phone as a reminder to stop what you're doing (even if you're doing fun stuff) and check in with your experience.

      • Orient to your body — what's touching the outside, what sensations are happening on the inside?

      • Without much thought, name 3 feelings. Just see them as neutral entities, and give them a wave.

      • Decide if you need to stop and do some deeper processing, or note emotions that may need to be revisited later, and then carry on!

We hope this helps you consciously and conscientiously navigate the days ahead!

You're the Expert!

Better than the Enneagram.

Better than Human Design.

Better than your astrological chart, your aura, or your Akashic record.

Those tools can be beautiful mirrors.

But Emotional Sovereignty gives you something they can’t:

⭐️ Real-time self-awareness

⭐️ Specific tools for working with how you are right now

⭐️ Agency in owning your authentic truth

It shows you:

✔️ Which part of your brain is currently running the show

✔️ What your habitual patterns mean

✔️ What helps you shift

✔️ What you truly need to be your biggest self

You don’t have to have a cosmic blueprint, or subjugate your identity to someone else’s authority. You just need your own attention, your own body, and the right tools to interpret your signals with compassion and skill.

Because self-knowledge isn’t a fixed sign.

It’s a living, breathing relationship with your nervous system, your history, and your becoming.

You are the expert on you.

And when you have the right tools, you don’t need to outsource your self-knowledge anymore.

That’s what we give you in Emotional Sovereignty School.

And our new free webinar gives you the 3-step framework that starts the process.

(https://www.centerforemotionaleducation.com/3step-cover)

It’s not about typing yourself.

It’s about meeting yourself.

And being able to respond to who you are, moment by moment.

That’s the kind of self-understanding that changes everything.

Not in theory.

In your bones.

In your relationships.

In your work.

In real time.

💛

Feeling some giddy delight over here...

We’re usually pretty laid back folks – but, not today!

Today we’re feeling too much excitement and enthusiasm to be chill.
.

We’ve been working on something super cool and we can’t stop thinking about it!

We’re delivering a 60-minute masterclass all about feeling better without having a bunch more money, or a ton of luxury time, and without unwanted medication.

Instead of sharing some isolated tips or theories, we’ll be outlining our foundational framework.

This is the same framework that has helped our students stop living in Survival Mode, start rewiring old emotional patterns, and become who they truly are.

Our signature program, Emotional Sovereignty School, is open for enrollment right now, and those who attend this free masterclass, will: 

– Learn the 3 major mistakes everyone makes when trying to feel better.
– Get our 3-Step Framework for feeling better, now (not when you’re richer or retired).
– And if you enroll in Emotional Sovereignty School from the masterclass, you'll get our new bonus –
✨Reprogramming 'Done for You' Guided Practice✨.
 

Please choose the time that works best for you.

Click below to register.

Pistachios, blankets, and the secret to everything

(Photo from Nathan of Echo, BobbyJon, and me at one of our favorite river spots.)

Sometimes...
 
When the air is the same temperature as my body,
and I have a blue watery horizon to rest my eyes on,
and maybe there's a thick picnic blanket under my bum,
some pistachio salt on my lips, 
and my river-loving lover's calf is rested gently against my calf...

And...

Even if my mind drifts further out to the rays of light that are my favorite people...
And through the crystal ball of this blissful moment I tune into them,
into their unique immediate worlds, 
and all seems well

I think to myself:
Oh. I've cracked the code to life.
This is what it's about.
I have arrived.

But then...

I love it too much.
I want to bottle it.
Or freeze it.
Or repeat it.
This tiny moment in time where everything on my outside tells my insides that it's ok.

And the wanting to keep it or repeat it, pings my amygdala.
Sends a scrambly old message of urgency and effort to my cells.

Because of course –
soon it won’t be summer.
One of those rays of light might have her heart broken,
or be in a fight with a co-worker,
or miss the important deadline for the important thing.

And sometimes...
There are no pistachios and I don't know what to eat,
And the sheets have been stripped but not yet replaced
and I'm sleepy enough to find this a disaster/emergency,
Or my river-loving lover is too cold for my cold skin to touch.

There will always be moments when my outsides tell my insides that it's not ok.

(Sure, everything is always “ok” if you zoom out to evolution, the cosmos, or glacial time.
But that’s not the scale my heart lives on.
My heart is nose-deep in the grass of now.
It knows what day of the week it is.
It knows what’s in the fridge.
Glaciers don’t.)
 

I’ve never liked being vulnerable to circumstances I can’t control.
There’s just too much powerlessness in that for me, thank you very much.

And yes, of course –
I tried inserting my considerable power over those circumstances.
I became the Miracle Woman™
(the one who does it all, all the time).

But we all know how that story ends.
No one wants that on their tombstone.

Instead, I want power over my experience.

I don't want my inner Serene Queen to have to wait on a summer day.

It took me years to figure out how to find her in the "off-season", 
the land of less-than-ideal external circumstances...

But now I know where she resides and how to bring her forth.

I won't bore you with it,
but there's a long montage to insert here of years of neuroscience research,
and putting theory to practice in the "lab" of our relationship, family, and client sessions.

Skip the montage...
and take the shortcut we made.

If you want to find your Serene Queen, regardless of season or circumstance,
let’s talk.

Or if you’re past talking,
and just want to feel better already,
you’re perfectly on time.

Emotional Sovereignty School was made for this.

This framework gives you the ability to steer your internal state –
no matter what’s happening outside.

In any case,
our inner goddesses see the inner goddess in you.

---

So you know –

Our 🐦‍⬛ Early Bird 50% Off, Is Ending Soon:

LIVE Emotional Sovereignty School
⛓️‍💥The step-by-step training in how your brain and nervous system really work – and what to do when they’re hijacked.
✨ Tuition now $1950 (previously $2500)
✨ Get 50% off with code BIRDIE thru July 25
✨ Bonuses include: The Glow Up, Sleep Upgrade, Income Boost, and Big Results Little Time

A Sticky Note for Your Heart: 5 Things You Need to Hear Right Now

If (perchance) you’ve been dropping balls, and/or snapping at people, and/or forgetting things you care about…

If your sleep is off, or your stomach’s tight, or everything feels loud and too much...

This is a letter for you.

We get how much you’re holding.
The commitments. The expectations. The care for others.
The grief. The hope. The fear.
The trying to be okay, to be good enough, to get it right.

You might look calm on the outside, but inside it’s a different story:
That tightness in your chest.
That feeling of being behind or of forgetting something you can't see.
The million invisible micro-decisions you make each day – just to keep going.

There’s nothing wrong with you.
Your brain and body are doing exactly what they were wired to do under this much pressure.

Before you read this any further…
 

Maybe just take a moment with us.

We invite you to:
• Push all the air out of your lungs.
• Let a fresh inhale come in through your nose, strong and full.
• Then let it go so slowly, like you’re stalling the end of it, or like you're singing.

Then gently check-in with your body:
• Let your shoulders drop and ease.
• Let your jaw unclinch and soften.
• Let even your tongue and teeth relax.

Then maybe bring a little love in:
• Place your hand on your heart
• Give it a super slow, gentle little rub
• Say your own name, and "I love you."

You’re doing so much.  

The world keeps speeding up, piling on, pushing harder.
And yet – you’re still here.

Showing up. Caring. Trying to hold it all together.

That effort alone is a kind of brilliance.

Here's a little tender reminder for you when you need it next:

(You can click the sticky note for a printable version.
Post it where you can see it when you need it.)

---

If it felt good to take a little moment for yourself and receive some love and connection, there's more where that came from. We're here standing by to support you further, when you're ready.

We've put together a list of upcoming support opportunities, (see below). If one of these is right for you, we’d love to walk beside you.

---

Upcoming Support Opportunities:

LIVE Emotional Sovereignty School ⛓️‍💥

The step-by-step training in how your brain and nervous system really work – and what to do when they’re hijacked.
✨ Tuition now $1950 (previously $2500)
✨ Get 50% off with code BIRDIE until July 25
✨ Bonuses include: The Glow Up, Sleep Upgrade, Income Boost, and Big Results Little Time

Private Coaching 📞

A few summer spots still open.

Support Fundamentals 🤝

The essential tools for supporting others and yourself in moments of upset – taught in a way that’s simple, clear, and immediately useful.

The World Gets Heavier, Emotional Sovereignty Gets Lighter.

Phew! The world is kinda intense right now, eh?

Like you, we’ve been watching the waves roll in:

⬆️ Prices steeply climbing.
⬆️ Anxiety and anger soaring.
⬆️ Exhaustion and overwhelm overflowing.
⬆️ Grief quietly pooling in the background.

And in all truth? That’s exactly why we created Emotional Sovereignty School — to help people soothe their emotional system, even when the world is out of control.
 

It’s also why, while nearly everything else is getting more expensive…

We’ve just lowered the tuition for Emotional Sovereignty School. Since we opened the course in 2020 it's been $2500. Now it’s $1950.

And that’s not all... We’ve added even more support, too.
 

What is Emotional Sovereignty School?

It’s our signature framework that shows you exactly how to navigate stress, overwhelm, and other intense emotions by understanding your brain, employing a wide range of tools, and working with your nervous system instead of fighting against it.

If you’ve ever wished you could stay calm when life gets chaotic… If you’ve found yourself overwhelmed, reactive, or stuck in old emotional patterns… This is the missing manual.
 

Inside Emotional Sovereignty School, you’ll learn how to:

✔️ Recognize which part of your brain is running the show (and shift it when necessary)
✔️ Regulate your nervous system in real-time – even in tough moments
✔️ Move through emotional upset with kindness and care
✔️ Rewire your brain for healthier emotional responses
✔️ Stay grounded, resilient, and clear – no matter the circumstances
 

Here are some Brand New Bonuses — all included when you join:

And, here are the same amazing bonuses we've always offered:

✨ Partners join for FREE! (Emotional Intelligence Dates, anyone??)

✨ Lifetime access to the material! (Watch or listen or reprint again and again...)

✨ Personal coaching support during class!

✨ Meaningful journal prompts to accelerate learning!

✨: Quiz questions to track learning!

✨ Cheatsheets, handouts, and printables! (Redecorate your fridge!)
 

And if you’re ready to jump in now? We’re making it even easier:

Half Off Early-Bird Tuition
💛 Enroll by July 25th and get HALF OFF your tuition.
That’s just $975 to radically upgrade your emotional life forever.
Coupon code: BIRDIE

This isn’t just about managing stress.

It’s about reclaiming yourself – so you stay steady, powerful, and present – no matter which way the world turns.

If it's right for you, we'd love nothing more than to have you with us this Fall.

---

What students are saying:

“I no longer experience panic.”

— Nathaniel

“There is nothing more empowering than becoming Emotionally Sovereign.”

— Kate

“ I’m not kidding, this learning WILL change your life, all of your relationships - and give you the tools to create more of what you truly desire.”

— Lauren

“It’s a game changer. I look at every interaction now through a new, more empowered lens.”

— Carone

Why Your Self-Care Isn't Working

We've been helping folks around the world not just feel better after an upset, but actually get so good at feelings that they rewire their age-old emotional patterns, for almost twenty years now.

So you can imagine we've really clocked what works and what definitely doesn't work when it comes to working with anxiety, overwhelm, irritation, and the like.
 

Want to know the biggest mistake most people make when they're trying to feel better?

Survey says: Relying on self-care alone.

The bubble baths. The weekends away. The workout plans. The eating right. The spa treatments. And all that well-meaning advice like: "You need more 'Me Time'."

or

"You need to take better care of yourself."

Look, we love self-care. We take baths, book massages, and schedule downtime. It feels fantastic.

But here’s the problem:
 

Self-care doesn't process emotion.

When we return from the getaway, our anxiety and overwhelm are waiting for us.
When we step out of that luxurious bath, the irritation jumps back in the moment it has a chance.
 

And yet, so many of us keep thinking:
“If I could just find more time for self-care… I wouldn’t feel this way.”

We thought that too.

For years, we believed if we could carve out more personal time, or be able to afford the things we love, the hard feelings would go away.
 

It's a natural mistake to make, because:

It’s the most common advice!
When we're struggling enough to finally say something out loud about it, most people lovingly, but annoyingly, let us know that we're not “taking care of ourselves” or we're "too busy", and that we need to "prioritize ourself.". 

Plus, self-care feels stupendous!
If we all had the time and money to do nothing but self-care, many of us would! It makes sense that when we're feeling "bad", the antidote is to do something that simply feels good.
 

But any relief we get from self-care doesn't last.

Here’s why:

• Emotion is processed internally, not addressed externally. So while we've moved "away" from the uncomfortable feeling, it's still there waiting for another opportunity to be expressed and integrated.
• Historical feelings and trauma don't care how cozy you get today, they're rising up from your past. In fact, getting more comfortable and at ease if often when historical feelings do come up.
• Self-care is beautiful – but it’s a rest, not a rewire. No amount of self-care in the world will make you better at working with your feelings.
 

So what happens if we keep making that mistake?

👉 We lose time – endless hours trying to nourish ourselves without meaningfully addressing the feelings.
👉 We lose money – self-care costs money, or costs time that could be used to earn money.
👉 We start to depend on getting away from our life just to function.
👉 We get temporary relief, followed by the same old spiral – wondering what’s wrong with us.
 

But when we stop making that mistake?

We can:
✨ Feel good inside our existing life.
✨ Access real relief – whenever we want, even without time or money.
✨ Save our energy for what matters most.
✨ Actually digest the overwhelm, anxiety, and rewire old patterns, for good.

It’s not about giving up self-care. It’s about (also) having the tools to help us actually feel better.
 

Here’s what one of our students shared:

"Before learning this work, I spent so much money trying to feel good. I booked trips, spa days, all the ‘self-care,’ but if I stepped out of my full-time self-care routine, the anxiety came flooding back. Now, I can shift my emotional state anywhere – in social settings, in the middle of parenting, even during hard conversations. My life has really opened up now."

Ready to stop outsourcing your peace to the next bath bomb?

We’d love to team up with you!

Upcoming Opportunities for Effective Support

Monthly Support Program:
Dear EQ, What Do I Do?
Emotionally intelligent ideas for life's challenges.
July 24, 11:30am Pacific

Personal Support:
Book a Complimentary "Feel Better Already" Session with a NeuroEmotional Coach
Openings available now

What really happened at the retreat…

Picture this:

You’re waking to the sound of hummingbirds outside your open window. Their little chirps weave in and out of the gentle hum of waves against the shore on one side and the trilling breeze rustling the jungle on the other..

You sit up to take in the blue horizon, and feel the morning kiss your bare shoulders.

There’s nowhere you need to be, but the saltwater pool is calling your name. 

There's nothing you have to do right now, but some mango and fresh juice sounds delightful.

This is what our retreat was like.

We traveled down the coast by boat from Puerto Vallarta where the high-rises fell away and the indigenous land remained. Protected and preserved by the Spanish settlers since the 1500s – it's as if even the flora and fauna, are relaxed. Sea turtles, dolphins, and whales play their way through the bay. Flowers and palm fronds wave lazily from the shore.

Our boat arrived, where  two rivers meet the sea, at the tiny fishing village of Yelapa. There are no roads for cars. Electricity and mobile phone services are fairly new. And the feel is ancient, welcoming, and gentle.

The cobblestone street from town gives way to mountain rock and beach sand on the walk to Pura Vida Wellness Center. Luggage, food, and any other supplies must be delivered by foot, burro, or tossed from a boat.

When we arrived we were greeted by smiles, a cooling cloth, and lime-basil juice – a delicious hint of the further delights that awaited us.

Every day we gathered around the table - plates heaped with veggies and tortillas made by Mexican matriarchs – sharing stories, sifting through feelings, gazing across the bay and into our hearts.  

We worked earnestly in circle, unpacking some old hurts, and laying the neuroemotional path to new, more easeful, more true selves.

We cried in supported yoga poses.
We raged in the saltwater pool.
We went on team escapades to check for room-dwelling geckos.

We learned how to ease away from over-functioning and over-forcing, and into ourselves, with a kind of reverence and hope most of us had forgotten was possible.

There was a moment — maybe you’ve had one like this — when we each felt the leap in our own heart after someone shared a truth they’d never spoken out loud.

And we just held it. Held that truth. Held each other. And felt the rippling effects tumbling into our futures.

And...
We’re doing it again.

If you've been in Survival Mode for far too long....
If anxiety and overwhelm have taken over...
If you've been working hard to manifest your best life only to find yourself even further down the wrong path...

This next retreat is for you.

We're calling it the
NeuroMagnetic Besties Retreat

An immersive and transformative experience for you and your favorite person:

• To get out of Survival Mode,

• Integrate the challenges of the past, and,

• Leverage this unparalleled NeuroEmotional modality to manifest what you actually want
  (because you can't manifest what your nervous system is currently afraid of...).

April 19-25 2026
Pura Vida Wellness Center
Yelapa, Mexico

If this speaks to you, grab your person, and let's go!!

Email love@centerforemotionaleducation.com with: "Me and my person are interested in the NeuroMagnetic Besties Retreat!" and we'll follow up with you about next steps!
(If you have questions, hit us up with those!)

Going away for deep immersive work with our people is one of our favorite events of the year. It's no exaggeration to say we're already counting the days until we get to be back in Yelapa, at Pura Vida, and hopefully with you and yours!

Can you see yourself there?

---

What folks are saying about our retreats:

"I feel so much gratitude for this retreat!
It was a space where I got to live out some of what I have been learning with repeated opportunities to be practicing in an environment that was regulated and encouraging. I was so thankful to fellow retreat goers who showed up ready to be their complete and vulnerable selves which made our learning so rich and supportive and I came away with some new habits and an action plan which gives me much hope!" ~ N

"The facilitation was as complex as rays of light thru a prism —  with safety, belonging, and deep connection and support woven in .  All needs were met." ~ R

"I got to practice being the person I dream of being while being surrounded with support and unconditional love. It gave me a path forward and helped me believe that becoming who I want to be is most certainly possible." ~ A

High-functioning, low fulfillment?

On a scale of 1 - bad, 6 - fine, to 10 - rad – how would things rate?

We've experienced all points of the scale over the 20+ years Nathan and I have been partnered up. 
In fact, we were just thinking of our "origin story" with neuroemotional work today while we walked to the river.

We were showing up.
We were trying hard.
But underneath it all… something was off.

We weren't where we dreamed of being.

We made it through each day – and though there were highlights, like nature-time, or adorable kid-time, we did not have the sense of having arrived in our true life. It was good-enough. But definitely not the fully vibrant, abundant, and embodied version we all hope for. 

We see this with our clients as well. When they come to us, they are:

• Snapping at the people they love most.

• Longing for deep connection but pushing it away when it shows up.

• Watching time pass in a blur of shoulds, obligations, and Survival Mode.

• Dreaming of a life that feels just out of reach because, somehow, they keep repeating the same old patterns.

We know just what that's like.

The turning point for us came one night at home after watching some shows together. As the escape into someone else's gripping narrative faded, I felt the discontent, disappointment, and despair come pouring back in.

I didn't like anything I saw. Every spot my eyes landed on seemed to glare back as blatant evidence that this. wasn't. it.

We were not doing it right.

We were not living our one precious life well enough.

Have you ever felt that way?

That night on the couch, what would later become our signature support method (the one that has now helped hundreds of people across the world), was in beta, only being used on kid squabbles, but Nathan pulled it out anyway. Recognizing the brain state that I was in, Nathan offered support that was aligned with that specific state. And though we had not remodeled our living room, quadrupled our bank accounts, or made any other real-world changes (all of that would come a little later), by the end of that conversation I felt different.

It was like a veil had been lifted from my eyes.

I turned to Nathan and said: "I want everyone in the world to have that."

Because it was more than just feeling better (which is plenty, am I right?), it was like getting passed the key to the realm I'd always wanted to live in. I felt alive, empowered, powerful, and like my true self. The future, my ideal life, came into view and I could see the path to making it a reality.

And so we brought it to the world.

While changing our own at the same time.

We kept offering ourselves this same signature method every time the feelings poured in, or the automatic reactions kicked on.

And eventually we changed the way our brains function.

Now we aren't living on auto-pilot, just making it through the day. We are truly living, connecting, and designing (almost) every action.

And our brains, our history, our circumstances are no different than anyone else's, we just learned what to do at each neurochemical crossroad.

Because it's not that you’re doing something wrong.
It’s that your nervous system is still doing what it learned to do long ago: Protect. Cope. Repeat.

But protecting and coping isn't good enough, right?

At the Center for Emotional Education, we specialize in helping high-functioning humans unhook from Survival Mode patterns that are silently shaping their lives, so they can finally create what they actually want:

💛 Less anxiety, overwhelm, and stress
💛 More joy, ease, and meaning
💛 A relationship that feels like home
💛 A life that fits who they really are
💛 A nervous system that doesn’t sabotage their best intentions

We provide a practical, neuroscience-backed, emotionally intelligent path toward authentic, connected living.

Not just healing, but rewiring.

Not just knowing better, but living differently.

Because the biggest heartbreak isn’t a single moment. It’s the slow erosion of the life you meant to live.

And you don’t have to keep missing it. There's a new path when you're ready.